What's wrong with me?

I really would like 2 know. I mean...I know there is some shit out there that catches my eye (these pictures are completely unrelated 2 this narrative. Please go about Ur business. Nothing 2 see here...move along!) that most normal motherfuckers would look at and be like, "Nigga, what's wrong with U?" I've been going throughout life figuring that so long as I ain't finna hurt nobody then it's all good. Live by the Rule of Three and always remember that Karma does come back and when it does it's usually a motherfucker...

Check this shit out!! I read in the paper 2day that Joan Jett and The Blackhearts is playing the Filmore in San Fransisco on November 4th!!! I am telling U right now I WANT 2 SEE THIS FUCKING SHOW! I have always wanted 2 see Joan Jett and I have never been 2 the Filmore...sounds like a marraige made in heaven 2 me!!!

the lowdown from down 'roun

Believe it or not, it looks as if Stacy B may have gotten rid of her mice problem (as in house mouse) . Somehow she got rid of the Kobester and his traveling sideshow. The girl...Alyssa (Yeah, that's right...I remember Ur name. Now what's my name? RickmthafknJones!) has some bad-ass curls. Her shit might even get all over mines, and U know I gots some MAD curls over here! As 4 the boy? Wel...quite frankly, I'm just not convinced the little brother ain't a fucking clone of his daddy, is all. I mean, honestly...has anyone ever really seen his momma? I don't know about that...sounds kinda shady 2 me...It prolly wouldn't have been so bad if my nigga would have brought some hustle with him, but from where I been sitting it looks like his hustle is Stacy B and that ain't cool. I wonder...what would Shawn do? Hmmm...I can't say. But I am pretty sure it would involve some camoflauge face paint, a ninja suit and six pages of handwritten instructions. Hey...don't get mad at me...I ain't the one who drove us here. Sides, I'm pretty sure that whenever U are discovered lying in wait amongst the shrubbery Ur friends get 2 give U shit about it...well...4ever. Oh yeah...like I'm finna lie about some shit like that! Keep it up and I might have 2 tell the story about the cat who got caught in the hood trying 2 put a long barreled shotgun in his pocket...


NEWS FLASH! Turns out that Ali caught ol' Sillywilly lying 2 her 2nite. And just what do U think he wuz lying 2 her about? Why...it wuz Jessica, of course. Why does this all sound so familiar? Maybe becuz we have heard all of this B4. But where wuz it? Hmmm...oh yeah! It wuz right here! How convienent is that? I guess that Sillywilly fancies hisself a playa, and 4 the moment he feels like playing with Ali and Jess. That's fucked up. The worst part is he don't give a fuck about either one of them. The only one he cares about is his own damn self! If that wasn't true he wouldn't be out here spreading his DNA like he wuz Johnny fucking Appleseed. It makes me so fucking mad I had 2 write this rhyme:

Sillywilly thought he wuz smart
So Sillywilly broke girlie's hearts
But whan he broke this one got more than he thought
Cuz Ali got Oodie and Willy got shot
Least...that's what we think since shots were reported
But U know eye witness accounts...they are always distorted.
But everyone did agree this wuz one crazy brotha
He blasted Will up until he shouted, "Who's the playa now, motherfucka?"
Then just like that he disappeared N2 the night
Both him and Sillywilly seemed 2 just drop out of sight
Along with any evidence, fingerprints or proof
Just cuz he didn't notice that nigga lying up on the roof

Okay, that makes me feel better! I hope it worked 4 U as well. Now, I'm finna go lay my head...

Pink Floyd : The Wall

SIDE 1

'In the Flesh?'
'The Thin Ice'
'Another Brick In The Wall' (Part 1)
'The Happiest Days Of Our Lives'
'Another Brick In The Wall' (Part 2)
'Mother'

SIDE 2

'Goodbye Blue Sky'
'Empty Space'
'Young Lust'
'One of My Turns'
'Don't Leave Me Now'
'Another Brick in the Wall (Part 3)'
'Goodbye Cruel World'

SIDE 3

'Hey You'
'Is There Anybody Out There'
'Nobody home'
'Vera'
'Bring the Boys Back Home'
'Comfortably Numb'

SIDE 4

'The Show Must Go On'
'In the Flesh'
'Run Like Hell'
'Waiting For the Worms'
'STOP'
'The Trial'
'Outside the Wall'


* SIDE 1 *

1. In the Flesh?

So ya
Thought ya
Might like to
Go to the show
To feel the warm thrill of confusion
That space cadet glow

Tell me is something eluding you, Sunshine?
Is this not what you expected to see?
If you wanna find out what's behind these cold eyes
You'll just have to claw your way through the disguise


2. The Thin Ice

Mamma loves her baby
And daddy loves you too
And the sea may look warm to you baby
And the sky may look blue

But oooh babe
Oooh baby blue
Oooh babe
If you should go skating
On the thin ice of modern life
Dragging behind you the silent reproach
Of a million tear stained eyes
Don't be surprised when the crack in the ice
Appears under your feet
You slip out of your death and out of your mind
With your fear flowing out behind you
As you claw
The thin ice


3. Another Brick In The Wall (Part 1)

Daddy's flown across the ocean
Leaving just a memory
A snapshot in the family album
Daddy what else did you leave for me?
Daddy what d'ya leave behind for me?

All in all it was
All just a brick in the wall
All in all it was
All just bricks in the wall

You!
You!
Yes, you!
Stand still, laddie!
Stand still!


4. The Happiest Days Of Our Lives

When we grew up and went to school
There were certain teachers who
Would hurt the children anyway they could
By pouring their derision
Upon anything we did
And exposing every weakness
However carefully hidden by the kid


"What have we here laddie?
Mysterious scribblings?
A secret code?
No - poems, no less - poems, everybody!
The laddie recons himself a poet!

'Money gets back
I'm all right Jack
Keep your hands off my stack
New car, Caviar,
Four star daydream
think I'll buy me
A football team'

Absolute rubbish, laddie!
(smack!)
Get on with your work!
Repeat after me:
An acre is the area of a rectangle whois legs ....

But in the town it was well known
When they go home at night
Their fat and psychopatic wives
Would thrash them within inches of their lives


5. Another Brick In The Wall (Part 2)

We don't need no education.
We don't need no thought control.
No dark sarcasm in the classroom.
Teacher, leave them kids alone.
Hey! Teachers! Leave us kids alone!
All in all it's just another brick in the wall.
All in all you're just another brick in the wall.

"Wrong, Do it again!"
"If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding."
"How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?"
"You! Yes, you laddie!"
"...poems, everybody! The laddie recons himself a poet!"
"You! Yes, you behind the bikesheds, stand still laddy!"



6. Mother

Mother do you think they'll drop the bomb?
Mother do you think they'll like this song?
Mother do you think they'll try to break my balls?
Oooo Ah
Mother should I build the wall?

Mother should I run for president?
Mother should I trust the government?
Mother will they put me in the firing line?
Oooh Ah
Is it just a waste of time?
(Mother am I really dying)

Hush now baby, baby don't you cry.
Mama's gonna make all of your nightmares come true
Mama's gonna put all of her fears into you
Mama's gonna keep you right here under her wing
She won't let you fly but she might let you sing
Mama's gonna keep baby cozy and warm
Oooh babe
Oooh babe
Oooh babe
Of course mama's gonna help build the wall

Mother do you think she's good enough
For me?
Mother do you think she's dangerous
To me?
Mother will she tear your little boy apart?
Ooh Ah,
Mother will she break my heart?

Hush now baby, baby
Don't you cry
Mama's gonna check out all of your girlfriends for you
Mama won't let anyone dirty get through
Mama's gonna wait up 'till you get in
Mama will always find out where you've been
Mama's gonna keep baby healthy and clean

Oooh babe
Oooh babe
Oooh babe
You'll always be a baby to me

Mother, did it need to be so high?


* Side 2*

1. Goodbye Blue Sky

Ooooooooooh
Did did did did you see the frightened ones
Did did did did you hear the falling bombs
Did did did did you ever wonder
Why we had to run for shelter
While the promise of a brave new world
Unfolds beneath a clear blue sky?

Ooooooooooh
Did did did did you see the frightened ones
Did did did did you hear the falling bombs
The flames are all long gone
But the pain lingers on

Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye blue sky
Goodbye, goodbye


2. Empty Space

What shall we use to fill the empty
Spaces where we used to talk
How shall I fill the final places
How should I complete the wall


3. Young Lust

I am just a new boy
A stranger in this town
Where are all the good times
Who's gonna show this stranger around?

Ooooooooh
I need a dirty woman
Ooooooooh
I need a dirty girl

Will some woman in this desert land
Make me feel like a real man
Take this rock & roll refugee
Ooooh Baby set me free

Ooooooooh I need a dirty woman
Ooooooooh I need a dirty girl
Ooooooooh I need a dirty woman
Ooooooooh I need a dirty girl


4. One of My Turns

Day after day
Love turns grey
Like the skin of a dying man
And night after night
We pretend it's all right
But I have grown older and
You have grown colder
And nothing is very much fun any more

And I can feel one of my turns coming on
I feel, cold as a razor blade
Tight as a tourniquet
Dry as a funeral drum.
Run to the bedroom in the suitcase on the left
You'll find my favourite axe
Don't look so frightened
This is just a passing phase
Just one of my bad days
Would you like to watch TV?
Or get between the sheets?
Or contemplate the silent freeway?
Would you like something to eat?
Would you like to learn to fly?
Would you like to see me try?
Would you like to call the cops?
Do you think it's time I stopped..?
Why are you running away?


5. Don't Leave Me Now

Ooooh Babe
Don't leave me now
Don't say it's the end of the road
Remember the flowers I sent
I need you, babe
To put through the shredder
In front of my friends

Ooooh Babe
Don't leave me now
How could you go?
When you know how I need you
To beat to a pulp on a Saturday night.

Ooooh Babe
Don't leave me now
How can you treat me this way
Running away

Ooooh babe
Why are you running away?
Ooooh Baby!


6. Another Brick in the Wall (Part 3)

I don't need no arms around me
And I don't need no drugs to calm me
I have seen the writing on the wall
Don't think I need anything at all
No Don't think I'll need anything at all

All in all it was
All just bricks in the wall
All in all you were
All just bricks in the wall


7. Goodbye Cruel World



Goodbye cruel world
I'm leaving you today
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye all you people
There's nothing you can say
To make me change my mind
Goodbye!



* SIDE 3 *

1. Hey You

Hey you!
Out there in the cold
Getting lonely, getting old,
Can you feel me?
Hey you!
Standing in the isles
With itchy feet and fading smiles
Can you feel me?
Hey you! Don't help them to bury the light
Don't give in
Without a fight.

Hey you!
Out there on your own
Sitting naked by the phone
Would you touch me?
Hey yoy!
With your ear against the wall
Waiting for someone to call on
Would you touch me?
Hey you! Would you help me to carry the stone
Open your heart, I'm coming home.

But it was only fantasy
The wall was too high as you can see
No matter how he tried he could not break free
And the worms they entered his brain

Hey you! Out there on your road
Always doing what you're told
Can you help me?
Hey you!
Out there beyond the wall
Breaking bottles in the hall
Can you help me?

Hey you! Don't tell me there's no hope at all
Together we stand, divided we fall!


2. Is There Anybody Out There

Is there anybody out there?


3. Nobody home

I've got a little black book with my poems in
Got a bag with my toothbrush and my comb in
When I'm a good dog they sometimes throw me a bone
I got elastic bands keeping my shoes on
Got those swollen hand blues
Got thirteen channels of shit on the TV to choose from
I've got electric light
And I've got second sight
I've got amazing powers of observation
And that's how I know
When I try to get through
On the telephone to you
There'll be nobody home.

I've got the obligatory Hendrix perm
And the inevitable pinhole burns
All down the front of my favourite satin shirt
I've got nicotine stains on my fingers
I've got a silver spoon on a chain
I've got a grand piano to prop up my mortal romains
I've got wild staring eyes
I've got a strong urge to fly
But I've got nowhere to fly to

Ooooh Babe
When I pick up the phone
There's still nobody home

I've got a pair of Gohills boots
And I've got fanding roots


4. Vera

Does anybody here remember Vera Lynn
Remember how she said that
We would meet again
Some sunny day

Vera! Vera!
What has become of you?
Does anybody else in here
Feel the way I do?


5. Bring the Boys Back Home

Bring the boys back home
Bring the boys back home
Don't leave the children on their own
Bring the boys back home


6. Comfortably Numb

Hello
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone at home?

Come on
Now
I hear you're feeling
Down
I can ease your pain
Get you on your feet again

Relax
I'll need some information first
Just the basic facts
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain
You are receding
A distant ship smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move
But I can't hear what you say
When I was a child
I had a fever
My hands felt just like
Two balloons
Now I've got that feeling once again
I can't explain
You would not understand
This is not how I am

I have become
Comfortably numb.

O.K.
Just a little pin prick
There'll be no more
AAAAAAAH!
But you may feel a little sick

Can you stand up?
I do believe it's working...good
That'll keep you going through the show
Come on, it's time to go

There is no pain
You are receding
A distant ship smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move but I can't hear what you say
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my fingers on it now
The child is grown
The dream is gone

And I have become
Comfortably numb.


* SIDE 4 *

1. The Show Must Go On

Oooh Ma Ooooh Pa
Must the show go on
Oooh Pa take me home
Oooh Ma let me go
Do I have to stand up
Wildeyed in the spotlight
What a nightmare!
Why don't I turn and run
There must be some mistake
I didn't mean to let them
Take away my soul
Am I too old is it too late

Oooh Ma Oooh Pa
Where has the feeling gone?
Oooh Ma Oooh Pa
Will I remember the songs?

The show must go on.


2. In the Flesh

So ya
Thought ya
Might like to
Go to the show
To feel the warm thrill of confusion
That space cadet glow
I've got some bad news for you, unshine
Pink isn't well he stayed back at the hotel
And they sent us along as a surrogate band
And we're going to find out where you fans really stand
Are there any queers in the theater tonight?
Get 'em up against the wall
There's one in the spotlight
He don't look right to me
Get him up against the wall
And that one looks Jewish
And that one's a coon
Who let all this riff-raff into the room
There's one smoking a joint
And another with spots
If I had my way
I'd have all of you shot


3. Run Like Hell

Run run run run
Run run run run
Run run run run
Run run run run

You better
Make your face up in your favourite disguise
With your buttondown lips
And your roller blind eyes
With your empty smile
And your hungry heart
Feel the file rising from your guilty past
With your nerves in tatters
When the cockle-shell shatters
And the hammers batter down your door
You better run

Run run run run
Run run run run
Run run run run
Run run run run

You better
Run all day and run all night
And keep your
Dirty feelings deep inside
And if you take your girlfriend out tonight
You better park your car well out of sight
'Cos if they catch you in the back seat t
Trying to pick her locks
They're gonna send you back to mother
In a cardboard box
You better run


4. Waiting For the Worms

Ooooh you cannot reach me now
Ooooh No matter how you try
Goodbye cruel world it's over
Walk on by.
Sitting in a bunker here behind my wall
Waiting for the worms to come
In perfect isolation here behind my wall
Waiting for the worms to come
Waiting to cut up the deadwood
Waiting to clean up the city
Waiting to follow the worms
Waiting to put on a blackshirt
Waiting to weed out the weaklings
Waiting to smash in their windows
And kick in their doors
Waiting for the final solution
To strengthen the strain
Waiting to follow the worms
Waiting to turn on the showers
And fire the ovens
Waiting for the queers and the coons
And the Reds and the Jews
Waiting to follow the worms
Would you like to see Britannia
Rule again my friend?
All you have to do is follow the worms
Would you like to send our coloured cousins
Home again my friend?
All you need to do is follow the worms


5. STOP

Stop
I wanna go home
Take off this uniform
And leave the show
And I'm waiting in this cell
Because I have to know
Have I been guilty all this time


6. The Trial

Good morning!
Worm Your Honour
The crown will plainly show
The prisoner who now stands before you
Was caught red-handed
Showing feelings
Showing feelings of an almost human nature

Shame on him
This will not do
Call the schoolmaster
I always said he'd come to no good
In the end your honour
If they'd let me have my way
I could have flayed him into shape
But my hands were tied
The bleeding hearts and artists
Let him get away with master
Let me hammer him today

Crazy
Toys in the attic
I am crazy?

Shall we go ....... (?)
They must have taken my marbles away

Crazy
Toys in the attic
He is crazy

Call me the defendant's wife
You - little shit you're in it now
I hope they throw away the key
You should have talked to me more often
That you did, but no you had to
Go your own way. Have you broken any
Homes up lately?
Just five minutes Worm Your Honour
Him and me alone
Babe, come to mother
Baby let me hold you in my arms
M'lord? I never wanted him to
Get in any trouble
Why'd he ever have to leave me?
Worm Your Honour let me take him home

Crazy
Over the rainbow
I am crazy

Bars in the window
There must have been a door there in the wall
When I came in
Crazy over the rainbow he is crazy
The evidence before the court is
Incontrovertable there's no need for
The jury to retire
In all my years of judging
I have never heard before
Of someone more deserving
The full penalty of law
The way you made them suffer
Your exquisite wife and mother
Fills me with the urge to defecate
But my friend
You have revealed your deepest fear
I sentence you to be exposed before your peers

TEAR DOWN THE WALL!


7. Outside the Wall

All alone
or in twos
The ones who really love you
Walk up and down
Outside the wall
Some hand in hand
Some gathering together in bands
The bleeding hearts and artists
Make their stand

And when they've given you their all
Some stagger and fall
After all it's not easy
Banging your heart against some mad bugger's wall

WOW!

So the other day I happened across a website that had all of the lyrics 2 Pink Floyd's The Wall album by Roger Waters posted on it. It occurred 2 me that although I have seen the movie countless times, and listened 2 the album hundreds of times, and watched the movie one time while listening 2 the album on acid and nowhere near a movie theater (actually the best time I saw the goddamned thing 2 tell the truth!), I had never actually sat down and read the lyrics as a whole. So I did. Holy shit on a shingle! Roger Waters is one brilliant, fucked up cookie, let me tell U! In fact, I wuz so impressed that I have decided 2 reprint them here in thier entirety (don't trip lawyers having 2 do with anything Pink or Floyd or Roger or Waters or anything else even remotely british...I promise not 2 make any money on the endevour, and if 4 some reason Im accidenbtally do? I shall immediately turn it over 2 whomever is most concerned over the matter!) uncut! Once U read them (and I truly hope U will, U lazy motherfuckers!) I think U will understand why I did it. I think U will get exactly what I mean when I say, "WOW!!!"


So, anyway...there I am surfing along the information superhighway...minding my own business...when I come across this website I've never heard of! Well, I felt a civic duty 2 check the goddamned thing out, right? Especially whenever U factor in the fact that it most likely has a few titties posted as content, right? Right! So I go check it out...

www.watcherswebclubhouse.com

and guess what I find on this motherfucker? I find pictures of my former neighbor Lee! Her username is Jessie something or other (when I saw it I remembered that sexyjessie used 2 be her e-mail, BTW) and apparently they are still actively getting their freak on! By they I mean her and her husband Dave, who wuz a strange cat on his own. I almost pissed myself laughing, let me tell U! I almost wrote something about this bitch the other day, mind U, and I flipped when I saw her out there. I don't knowif I should consider this a sign or not. I have always thought she wuz sexy, and I wouldn't mind taking that out 4 a test drive...if U get my drift! I have always regretted not fucking this broad while I had the chance. Who knows...maybe fate has smiled on me and offered me a second chance 2 tap that ass!!! Matter of fact, if I remember correctly...I think Dave wuz one of those cats who is really big on watching his old lady fucking other men. Hmmmm...where exactly do I get an application?